Dealing with Bullies: 3 Ways to Deal with “Mean Girls”

by | Mar 3, 2017 | Back to School Tips for Teens, Bullying, Parenting Tips, Teen Advice | 0 comments

Dealing with bullies is so stressful!  You probably feel scared, alone, and maybe even hopeless.

It’s hard to describe what it’s like dealing with bullies.   Unless you’ve personally been bullied, you can’t imagine what it’s like to be bullied in middle school.

The damage that bullies (especially the school “mean girls”) can do to your self-esteem.

As someone who has experienced bullying in school all my life my heartbreaks.  I believe that bullying is one of the toughest things many girls have to go through as they grow up.

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Here are 3 Quick Tips to Use When Dealing with Bullies in Middle School..

Dealing with Bullies Tip 1: Lean on your friends

When it comes to bullying, there is a huge amount of power in numbers. Body language is the most powerful deterrent to bullying. Think about it.  Would you want to pick on someone who’s laughing and talking to her friends?  Or someone who’s standing alone and staring at the floor?
If bullying occurs at a routine time, use your friends to discourage bullies. For example, let’s say there’s a girl who makes fun of your clothes on the walk to lunch every day.  You can ask your best friend to meet up in between classes so you don’t have to walk alone.

Dealing with Bullies Tip 2: Take the high road

When dealing with bullies, you might be tempted to lash back at a bully.  But this is not usually the best way to deal with the problem.
Remember that bullies are extremely insecure in themselves.  As a result, they pick on other people in an attempt to distract others from their own flaws. Getting a rise out of you is exactly what they’re looking for, so instead, show the bully that you will not stoop to their level to play their childish games.
If a bully takes the effort out of her day to tease you, there’s nothing less satisfying than an eye-roll and a “whatever” as you walk away.

Dealing with Bullies Tip 3:  Kill them with kindness

When your school has a bully or a gang of mean girls, chances are that you are not their only target.  Most likely their are others dealing with bullies too. Because you know how awful it feels to be teased or made fun of, offer a helping-hand to other victims.  Inviting other girls who have also been dealing with the bullies to walk, talk, or hang out with you is easy…For example,

“Did Allison call you ugly too? Ignore her, she does the same thing to me. Would you like to come sit with me at lunch?”This will have the added benefits of not feeling so alone, and you’ll show the bully that she has no power over your happiness.

Plus, you may never know how much your friendship means to others that are dealing with the bullies too!

Yellow traffic sign reading bully free zone. Dealing with bullies

If your daughter is dealing with bullies

When you are the mother of a bullying victim, it’s important to be supportive of your daughter and how she chooses to deal with the situation. If bullying is persistent and having a negative effect on her, nearly every school has a strict no-tolerance policy on this type of behavior.

However, do not be surprised if your daughter does not want to take her problem to the school.

For many girls, the fear of what the bully will do if the school is notified is much greater than the fear of the actual bullying itself. As a mother, you should make her aware of this option and encourage her to speak with a trusted teacher if the above steps do not work, but you should never betray her trust and speak to the school without her permission.

Instead, let your daughter know that she is better than her bully, and the things the bully says about her are not true. The best way you can help her through dealing with the bullies is to provide a safe, loving environment to come home to.

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